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August 22, 2007



If you know that you are done with having babies then a condom would be a good idea, I am not sure about the mini-pill but if the effectiveness (and no side effects for baby) is just as good as the regular pill then I would say go for it. Condoms are just no fun, but easier (for peace of mind since you are breastfeeding).

I can't wait to meet E's and L's little brother (or sister, sorry i guessed boy, I really think it will be a boy)


We use condoms (I'm not a candidate for hormonal birth control) and they can be fun sometimes, I mean, if you are creative about putting them on. We have had our oops moments though, so if a fourth would kill you, I'd add in a spermicidal foam or something as well.


We use little more than prayer. Here's the thing--neither of us want more, but one of us (ahem, him) would be more bothered by getting pregnant again than the other. He promised me he'd get a vasectomy, and still doesn't seem at all opposed to the idea. But the twins are 2 years, 2 months AND HE STILL HASN'T SCHEDULED THE APPOINTMENT. I'm sticking to my guns on this one--he is the one that will be responsible for the birth control from here on out...


I know you didn't ask about IUD, but I must say, I LOVE mine. LOVE IT! My last baby is 2 now, and I've hardly had a period since 9 months BEFORE she was born. Seriously! I could give you TMI details, but let's just say I spotted more during my healthy pregnancies than in the last year's cycles.

The Mirena IUD and breastfeeding (yes, still!) is what I can thank (when I just breastfed, I got my cycles back at 4-5 months). I can give you more info if you want, just email me. I'm not sure what the effectiveness of the mini-pill is, but I know it's no-where near the Mirena IUD. The Mirena is thought to be as effective as vasectomy.

Sorry for unsolicited assvice, but I had to share (in case any one else was interested in IUD.)


We'll be doing condoms. It's what both of us prefer. I have too many side effects w/ most hormonal birth control. If my PCOS should cooperate, we'd like a second in a few years, but I'm also not interested in having that rogue egg turn up 3 months post-partum. No Irish Twins if I can help it :) You're a nurse, so you probably know this, but the mini-pill is not as effective as the regular pill--it needs to be taken at EXACTLY the same time each day. I tried the mini-pill years ago as an alternative to the regular, and I found a watch with a beeping alarm to be a necessity. I was single at the time, so I did mini-pill + condoms b/c I didn't trust the mini-pill, especially with all the breakthrough bleeding I experienced. Nursing might help with that, I'm not sure.

If you go the condom route, try ordering them in bulk. We use condomania.

liz s

I have to agree that the mirena IUD is so wonderful. It is 5 year birth control, but you can always get it taken out early. Most insurance covers it. There are very few side effects (except decreased menstruation and who's complaining). Mini-pill is risky because of your weird schedule. Its very finicky.

And yes, the cervix does get mushy and never the same again. Although after a 9 year gap, the body will labor like a primapara again.


Condoms. We only use them for the grand finale though - we like to live on the edge. We have successfully avoided pregnancy for the past 3 years with this method - of course, I wouldn't advocate it to teenagers or others who would be devastated by a pregnancy. FYI - I got pregnant 3 times on the first cycle we attempted pregnancy, so I think I'm pretty fertile and this method still works for us - then again, maybe I now suffer from infertility and don't know it.


hey. my vote is condoms, although K here agrees with A's suggestion.

condoms are easy, cheap, and make sex and clean-up mess-free. how practical can you get? and they come in tuxedo black, textured, neon, flavored, and glow-in-the-dark.


We use the tried and true "abstinence" method. You probably won't want to go there. Condoms are much better.


I'm not willing to take any chances with breastfeeding (mini-pill is known to affect supply) so we did condoms for a year and then I went back on Desogen. I plan to start fenugreek and blessed thistle as soon as the babe is born so supply shouldn't be an issue, but we'll still do condoms.


I'm taking the mini-pill (in combination with breast feeding), though I've only been taking it less than a month. So far no issues with supply or anything else.


We use condoms. I hated birth control with a passion, and though I am open to the FAM, my husband is afraid that it won't be effective or we'll miss a fertility sign.

For the most part, I still monitor my fertility signals because it makes me comfortable with my body, but we use condoms so he's more comfortable. I would be fine with an IUD, but since I've never had any children my OB/GYN doesn't want to use one.


I have the Paragard Copper (read: non-hormonal) IUD and love, love, love it. I've noticed a bit of cramping (never had any before) and that's it. It is wonderful! It didn't interfer with breastfeeding at all and doesn't make me a raving b*tch the way hormonal BC does.

Before then it was condoms and I really liked them. My faves were always Trojan "Extra Sensitive" and "Twisted Pleasure". I liked the ease of clean up and didn't notice a difference in sensation. Hubby may disagree but there ya go.


Mushy cervix, huh?

I'm guessing mine is a mess, what with the cerclage and all....

We use condoms because when I went on B/C after pregnancy, I had awful, terrible headaches and had to give it up after toughing out the 2-week adjustment period. I could have tried another pill but couldn't face the headaches.

Sorry, I don't remember which pill it was. I had supply issues such that I wouldn't try ANY pill while B/Fing.


I also agree with using condoms until your husband has the vastectomy done. They're inexpensive and easier to use in my opinion. This is the route I would take if I was able to conceive naturally. But I don't think I will ever have this problem as my body seems to be making its own birth control.

And no, I also had no idea about the mush cervix. I can't wait to experience pregnancy for a second time and feel all the similarities/differences.

Anne Glamore

You should have seen how quickly my husband made an appt to get snipped after the twins were born! 3 boys under 3 will do that!

While we were waiting, when we felt the urge to make love, we put on astronaut-ish jumpsuits, I took the pill, he used condoms, and we only had oral sex, because we were serious about no more tots.

We just got back from a vacation with my friend who has an 11 yr old and then was "infertile." Her 3 yo and 10 month old came too.

Sorry I didn't answer ANY of your questions...


I haven't used birth control in 8 years, but wanted to tell you to ask Dawn about the mini-pill. She conceived Zoe using the mini-pill while nursing full time. So, be careful still if you go that route.


I hadn't heard about mushy, but I'd heard that after childbirth the cervical os (is that the right medical term? If so, don't I feel clever.) takes on the appearance of a smile, rather than a straight line. I kinda like that imagery. My cervix worked and now it's happy!

My memory, which is sometimes faulty, is telling me that you've said that your cycles became regular after you had the girls. If you have regular cycles after the birth, you can consider fertility awareness for birth control, esp. since you'll still be dealing with something of a subfertility situation. (Right? Might be worthwhile to get A tested again, things can certainly change on that end.) If you're fairly regular of cycle, you can do fertility awareness pretty casually, without thermometers or charts or OPKs. You just know that there's roughly a 10 day window during which you need to be careful and do condoms/abstinence/pulling out. It's not the world's most foolproof method, but I think it's a decent choice if you've got reliable cycles and if another pregnancy wouldn't be the end of the world. It's certainly cheap enough, doesn't have side effects, and is totally safe while breastfeeding....


We use the "these kids keep sleeping in our bed" method of birth control. With 3 kids (and another on the way) it seems like somebody is always sick, having a bad dream or just needing Mommy, so the bed is a little full for sex. After this baby is born, I was considering a tubal, but have mixed feelings about it. Hubby will likely have the Big V in a year or so instead. Between the birth and that, we'll probably use lack of interest as our method. I hate the pill, in all forms and am allergic to spermicide, so we don't do either of those. Sorry to not be of any help!


My husband had the "big snip" done while we were pregnant with our 4th. Prior to that we used condoms during that fertile 10 days or so. I just wanted to bring up one thing - my milk supply dropped with each baby. I had enough milk to feed an entire day care with my first, but not so much after that. So I may be a bit hesitant to try anything that might interfere with my supply.

Just my 2 cents. Can't wait to hear about this baby's arrival!


I agree with Summer about FAM being done pretty effectively and easily when your cycles are regular, but I was nervous about it while my cycles weren't regular due to breastfeeding. This past time around I had some unfortunate post-partum hormonal balance issues that caused some irregular bleeding, and as a result I was prescribed the NUVA ring. I was put on it 10 weeks pp while exclusinvely breastfeeding and was told that it was as safe as the mini-pill. It was completely effective and so easy. There is nothing to remember except replace it once a month, it costs about the same as the pill, insertion is simple and you can't tell it is in once you have inserted it.


Haven't heard of a mushy cervix, but have been told my uterus is boggy.


The nuvaring might be an interesting choice for your in-between period: hormonal, but not pills and not permanent. I have heard very positive things about it, and have heard (and experience) mini-pill horror stories (in terms of hormonal side-effects). If I were using hormonal bc, it's probably the one I'd try first. Though I know nothing about nuva ring + breastfeeding, so this may be an entirely useless comment. :)


We used the minipill after the first child. It works fine, but only if you take it religiously every 24 hours. I didn't have any side effects. After #2, I took the minipill again for a while, and then my husband had a vasectomy when the baby was about 8 months old. Husband was adamant that he would have no more children, and I was okay with a permanent solution. We waited the eight months because I was worried about jinxing anything by doing it sooner-- some of the same fears you mentioned. If he wouldn't have volunteered, I'd probably have gone for an IUD.


I charted for years. Since the kids now keep my sleep so irregular it is hard to do the temp each morning. I still know where I am in my cycle and if we need to use condoms.
I tried the mini pill after E and had a hard time keeping my milk supply up. We have just used condoms since J2 was born.


For birth control, lately we've been using intense, hormone fueled bitchiness, and the sounds of toddlers shrieking in the next room. It's quite effective.

While I was still breastfeeding, I used the minipill, and loved it. Easy, no funky side effects, etc.- the only way I could have loved it more is if it tasted like chocolate cheesecake.

Good luck with the upcoming excitement! I wish you a speedy, smooth delivery and recovery, and a chubby, happy, healthy baby.


I used the mini-pill while breastfeeding both my girls and had no issues. Make sure you use back-up when you start weaning though. I have known a few women who got pregnant on it when the breastfed child was around 11 months and starting to eat many more solids. Now currently using a low-dose pill and trying to decide what to do for another year or two before the big V for my husband. I am scared of the IUD, but the few women I know who have it LOVE it.

I LOVE Eve's post! I agree with her, but could have never come up with such a witty way of stating it!


I went on the mini-pill for three months while I breastfed my daughter and then never bothered to refill the prescription. She is 3 1/2 now and still an only child so I guess we don't really need birth control. If we do have a second, I will just use FAM and continue our pattern of abstinence around ovulation. It's not hard to do and some months I don't even ovulate.


What about LAM? I know you said you don't want to go the fertility awareness route, but the only fertility sign you have to watch for with LAM is bleeding between 56 days and 6 months postpartum. If you're fully breastfeeding and not bleeding, odds of pregnancy are very small (less than 2%). If you bleed, you need a new method.


Well I was on the mini-pill and nursing Rachel at 9 months when I got pregnant. At least my midwife told me before I started taking it that it I should back it up with condoms. I believe her first words at my first pre-natal were "forgot the condom, eh?"
Seriosuly, condoms or surgery (which I keep harping my husband about - what better time to do it than when I am pregnant and CAN'T get pregnant????)

Another Andrea

I got pregnant with my twins (their ID though, so I didn't release two eggs) on the mini-pill when DS#1 was 13 months old. I'll admit - I missed 2 doses in a row and was on antibiotics....I guess I'm saying - take it RELIGIOUSLY and not while on any antibiotics! But - I was also told that you have a higher chance of getting pregnant on the mini pill - even when taken correctly. Yeah....my husband RAN out and got the big "V" by the time the twins were 4 months.

Condoms - boo, no fun.

Jenn (dish)

I seem to be the odd woman out in this discussion. I know that I will be having a c-section this time and because this baby was a "you can get pregnant with sex?" baby, I am opting for a tubal ligation. My husband's only concern is that it happens as soon as the baby is born. But it doesn't change my age, and also doesn't change the fact that we were already confortable with adoption in lieu of pursuing another IVF, so I don't see that it's a problem (for us, at least).


I'm waiting with bated breath for the baby announcement.

I'm sorry you had such a disturbing dream, though.


I'm waiting with bated breath for the baby announcement.

I'm sorry you had such a disturbing dream, though.

Laura K.

Before the big "V" (and not for victory), we used condoms. They were annoying at times, and once or twice we had an 'oops' with 'em, too, but all in all they were not so bad. Usually guys don't like them as much, which might be why A offered up his, um, suggestion. ;) Although C did like using them becuase he felt he could stay in the game a bit longer. Yep, there you go...TMI right here.

Then there's that whole fertility awareness, cervical mucus checking thing. Hmmm. I found it to be a much easier method for trying to GET pregnant than for birth control. Too many rules to remember.

Hey, no weight gain since your last appt? You rock! :) I can't believe you are getting SO CLOSE to having this baby!


FWIW, I was without period due to breastfeeding, and was taking the minipill, managed to have my prescription run out, and got pregnant on my first ovulation (no period) after missing three pills. Now, missing three pills is abusing the system, but if you aren't really careful with it there is a pretty high failure rate.



Mirena mirena mirena!


Unrelated but...

I was not familiar with the word multipara, so I followed your link and read the definition. Then it said that woman who've had four pregnancies were grand mulitparas.

Which of course led me to think of Mrs. Duggar (Mom of 17 bio children.) So, she must be called the Great Grand Pupah Queen Wizard Multimultimultpara of the World!

Anyway, no advice to give on BC. Besides using condoms in my 20s, I have not needed to use it yet. Sad, but I guess it is one of the few silver linings of IF to not have to deal with it.

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