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April 19, 2007

Comments

liz s

My pastor made a comment about how difficult it is to watch my 2.5 yr old. It really hurt my feelings. He is BUSY and he has this wicked grin but he is smart, sweet, and funny!

That recipe sounds too good. I'm going to have to stay away from it though. I am determined to lose the 8 lbs I gained last year from stress.

I wish my husband would get the part about cleaning. He always tells me that if I want to alone time to just let him know. The problem is when I get back the house is trashed and then I regret leaving.

Yeah for good weather. It certainly changes my mood.

Jackie

I am so sorry that you are feeling not so great these days. I wish that I could make you feel better.

My girlfriend always complains to my neighbor (we live 3 houses apart) about my kids. And worst part is, she is their godmother. But she always bad mouths them and it drives me insane! Everyone raises their kids differently and every child has a different personality. While some may be laid back some are not- mine are not! But kids are kids and they are perfect just regardless of their personality! Why?? Because look how we got our babies L- by miracles. We are so fortunate to have these babies- think off all the work that went into us getting our girls. We struggled and struggled for years and we are so blessed to have them.

On the potty training issue. My Annie decided 2 months ago to just start going on the potty. I had their little potties in the bathroom for probably 9 months and every once in a while they would use them. But one morning, she decided that she wanted to go on the potty. And she did and did and did. ANd in 3 days, we were wet free! And I didnt even have to remind her! Emily on the other hand, has no interest. I bought Annie a bitty baby by American girl as her big treat for potty training. I bought Emily one too and she knows its still in the box waiting. But her answer is every day when I ask her, "I not ready yet mom." Its always the same reply, sometimes, maybe tomorrow! But I take it all in stride and think that maybe before she goes to kindergarden she will be in pants!!! LOL

Hugs to you and your sweet girls. I missed so much when you werent posting! I come to your site everyday looking for a post and just to see pics of those angels of yours! btw, loved those little rumps in the pants, so cute!

Jen

Ooh, those cookies are good, aren't they? (Now, of course, I can never look at the batter in the same way--thanks!)

I'm sorry things are rough. It's hard, isn't it, when you know you're exactly where you wished to be in your life, and you're still feeling slightly dissatisifed. I find that the unrelenting monotony of housework has a huge effect on me that way--no matter how often or how well you do it, it just keeps coming!

Best of luck with the potty-training--sounds like it's going relatively well.

Melody_NC

Note to self: pick up Reese's peanut butter chips next time I'm at the store. Those cookies sound yummy!

So sorry that your friend hurt your feelings. Some people just don't get twins and I'm sure she didn't mean to hurt you by what she said but I know that doesn't take the sting away. For what it's worth I'm always impressed with how well you manage taking care of your girls all week and then working through the weekend. I really don't know how you do it. My girls are in daycare all week but I'm lucky enough to work a job with very flexible hours so I usually don't drop them off until 9am and then pick them up around 4:30pm. I have lots of time for me to go to the gym at lunch, run errands, etc. You, my friend, rarely get a break and although I know you have your bad days, you keep it all together. I think you're a great mom and that your girls are just perfect! Of course, I myself am also particularly partial to 3 year old twin girls! ;)

I'm hoping for warmer weather up your way, I agree that better weather always helps my mood.

Rach

I remember going through a period with my son (now 3) when I would dread going to sleep at night because it meant hearing him wake up at 6 and having to go in and change his diaper and get him dressed and play with him and start the whole thing over again.... I DO love him more than anything but nothing, NOTHING in life can prepare you for how much kids need you and it's just exhausting (and makes the little necessities of life like taking out the trash and emptying the dishwasher seem monumental). When my daughter was born (when my son was two) I found it so depressing to be back in that place just as he was getting more independent. It's so hard. Hang in there.

Beth

My b/g twins turned 3 in February, and I totally relate to your feelings. On several fronts - potty training, housework, the monotony of day to day life, needing a break. Regarding housework, last summer my husband had an accident as was in bed with broken bones for almost 6 weeks. I had to do everything and on top of that my son had two separate trips to the hospital with pneumonia. Somehow I managed to find the money to hire a housecleaner twice a month. It changed my life. I recently cut it back to once a month, but coming home to clean house...the whole house clean at one time...is the best thing in the whole world. If you can swing it I highly recommend it.

Hang in there - funny how one good night's sleep, a pretty day, or one day without tantrums or accidents can lift your spirits.

Becca

I would love to see a picture of Lucy with three leashes! Too cute.

Lil

*hugs* I think I hate the "pity" comments most of all. Don't take it personally, because three is just a really hard age. Besides your kids are perfect!

Lisa C.

Have you considered hiring help with the housework or the laundry? I thought it was something that I would never do, but I hired some people to come do spring cleaning on the house, and it was awesome. For once, the house is clean! Really, super clean.

I'm going to have them back once a month.

Tina

I had a counselor tell me one time that when I feel overwhelmed it's a good indicator that I needed some me time. So even if it feels decadent, or selfish taking an hour to watch a movie and not make a list in your head or a walk with no purpose or something that is just for you even if it's for a few minutes, helps restore you. To the point that not everything is overwhelming and you get a fresh perspective. Just some thoughts to think and feel free to ignore them.

-Blue

OK, The pity comment would've rubbed me the wrong way as well.

I get that all the time. Mine are 5, 4, 3, 22 months and 6 weeks. Folks who are not living it tend to react with horror/sympathy. They have no idea of the exponential joy that goes with the frustration.

I even have a t-shirt that says: "I'm glad it's me and not you, too!"

I say just smile benevolently and go on. Life is short. YOU have the best deal.

-Blue

marion

You know, maybe it's that I don't have children, but I have babysat an awful lot of children ranging widely in age, background and loveability in my day...and it's never even occurred to me to tell a parent that I felt "sorry" for him or her. I have thought, and said, "Wow, you really have your hands full!" and, "Boy, I don't know if I could do this - you're tough," and the like, but, "I feel sorry for you?" No. Kids, even great ones, are tough, but what "I'm sorry" says, in my mind, is "Your kids are a handful, and surely you can't love them enough to make up for that fact." Ugh. (I'm sure that's not what people *mean* - at least, I hope not - but...)

Amy F

I did in fact eat half a dozen of those exact cookies yesterday (although Lost had to wait--hopefully I'll get to it tonight). It was a happy day when I realized I had cocoa in the cabinet and I wouldn't have to return to the store to make those cookies.

I get a lot of "gosh, your hands are full" comments at stores, which seems ridiculous to me because aren't there a lot of people with two young kids? Yes, I'm wearing one son and have another in the grocery cart, but for the most part, they aren't screaming or crazed while we're out, and why is it so pity-inducing?

My mood (and Peter's) is so influenced by the weather. Dan had conferences at school until 9:30 last night and I bounced along just fine until 8:30 when Leo didn't go to bed the second time I tried and Peter started fighting me too -- a month ago I would have been going crazy by 5:30 and run off to a grandparent's house. I just hope we're in a bigger house with running room before next winter.

KatS

Sosososo cute about the leashes. I never thought of that! What a nice way to give the kids the feeling of control but parents have the REAL control. Great idea!

I so empathize with you about the peeing in the undies. And, Linda, I am now working full time again and every day is a vacation (from the babies). So. I. get. it. (without having weekends with no sleep or without family time like you do.

I often feel like people pity or are annoyed by my family. Often just being at church and running around at coffee afterwards makes me look harried and frenzied and I often wonder what people are thinking about me/my children/my parenting skills. But we all do our best as best we can. And your life and your beautiful children are perfect for you right now, even if you have moments. You are a great mom with a fantastic family just getting by and trying to enjoy your life together. Yeah, you!

KatS

Sosososo cute about the leashes. I never thought of that! What a nice way to give the kids the feeling of control but parents have the REAL control. Great idea!

I so empathize with you about the peeing in the undies. And, Linda, I am now working full time again and every day is a vacation (from the babies). So. I. get. it. (without having weekends with no sleep or without family time like you do.

I often feel like people pity or are annoyed by my family. Often just being at church and running around at coffee afterwards makes me look harried and frenzied and I often wonder what people are thinking about me/my children/my parenting skills. But we all do our best as best we can. And your life and your beautiful children are perfect for you right now, even if you have moments. You are a great mom with a fantastic family just getting by and trying to enjoy your life together. Yeah, you!

Alina

Some days are really hard and you feel really down. I feel ya on those thoughts too. My daughter is fully daytime potty trained(still in pull ups at night). I am a little freaked out that my daughter is so independent now and here I go starting the whole process over again but I just can't wait to experience it again.

Claudia

"Less laziness and more industriousness would make relaxing feel more relaxing."

So me. With hubby on the couch today, doing nothing for a brief moment, I asked, "what are we doing?" I meant, "what should I be doing right now?" Hubby said we were relaxing. I couldn't. There was/is too much to do, too much hanging over my head to truly relax. He has no understanding of that mindset whatsover. Glad to hear someone else does.

Becky

I have never thought of using more than one leash to walk the dog before! What a great idea! I usually make Emily let me do the leashes, because one of our dogs weighs much more than she does.

As for the laziness... we all face this from time to time. Usually I let things go too long, then go into a cleaning or laundry frenzy because I can't stand it anymore. I recommend you back to Flylady.net, who I originally learned of from you. I only manage to do about 30% of what she recommends, but I am a happier person for it.

Becky

Megan

Just wanted to say that there are people who understand how wonderful it is but how hard it is! I first came across your blog when we were struggling through infertility and IVF, and when I saw the pictures of E & L, I just couldn't have conceived of better fortune - two baby girls! We were also very lucky, and have two beautiful one-year old girls ourselves, and it is so wonderful, but so very hard, too. Please know that every time you recount your trying times here, you're helping lots of others who think that they're the only ones struggling. Many many congrats on the pregnancy, and give yourself lots of breaks. You are doing at least 3 or 4 jobs, by my count!

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