Indigo Girl

Vacuum

I bought a vacuum cleaner this past week when we found out that our 10 year old one was going to cost $80 to fix. I poured over websites and reviews and every time I thought, "This is the one!" I would read a negative review or two and then think, "Oh, not THAT one! Our lives would be RUINED." There is nothing better than strongly worded Amazon reviews to make you second guess yourself a million times. I don't know which reviewers are being reasonable and which are crabby unhappy people who are always complaining about something. I mean, some of the reviews complained that the vacuum was LOUD. WHAT? A LOUD VACUUM? SAY IT AIN'T SO.

I hemmed and hawed for hours and then overnight. Twitter told me that I should get a Dyson or a Roomba and I patted Twitter on its head and told it that those are more than twice what my budget is, bless its heart. Finally, a friend with a Consumer Reports subscription told me the top two under $200 and I bought one of those. I don't even want to tell you what it is in case you've had an awful experience. I just want it to arrive tomorrow before 8 pm like the tracking says so we can vacuum our increasingly filthy rugs.

Twitter also reassured me that I do not win at the Laundry Folding Procrastination game, although I think the three weeks worth in this picture is my own personal record. 

We had another snow day on Monday and, if you're keeping track, in the last three weeks we've had two days with a sick kid at home and two snow days and NOT ONE has been on a day that I'm off work. I only work three days a week! I feel like ONE of them should have been on my day off. This one was because of icy roads, so A was going to work from home anyway and it all worked out. 

Bad Harry Potter Jokes

I think L was sleepwalking last night and it was the most hilarious thing. A sleepwalked (?)(sleptwalked?) when he was little. Well, kinda. His mom says it was more like sleeprunning and I'm a little suspicious that he was a typical kid and was awake and full of energy, but pretended to be asleep.

Anyway, she stumbled downstairs looking sad and lost. 

Me: What's wrong, honey?

Her: [blank stare]

Me: L? What's wrong?

Her: [sits down and makes herself comfortable] It's my. . . 

Me: [waits]

Her: It's my . . . It's my . . . [gets distracted by the dog and starts petting her]

Me: L! Are you okay? WHAT'S WRONG?

Her: [gets up and wanders away]

A finds her bumping around the breakfast nook.

Him: L? What's wrong?

Her: [spins slowly in a circle looking confused]

Him: Do you need to go to the bathroom? It's right over there.

Her: [Stumbles to the bathroom. She's in there for a long time]

Me: L? Are you okay in there?

Her: [sing song] Mmmmmmmm-mmmmmmm

Us: [giggling uncontrollably into our hands]

 She doesn't remember anything, but I had fun reenacting it for her today.

E and L went to a birthday party yesterday and came out looking and acting like teenagers. I'm not ready for this with all the rocking out to One Direction and Taylor Swift. I had already pointed out the slightly older girls at the roller skating rink to A - the ones with their outfits accessorized, skating together in little groups and giggling at the boys. The party included a beauty parlor with manicures and hair stuff and make-up. Then they put together a dance with the wii game Just Dance and ate a bunch of food. Families were invited back to sled in their backyard at the end, so we spent an hour sledding.

During the party, we went jeans shopping for A. Usually jeans shopping sucks, but he's down two sizes, so it was encouraging rather than discouraging. Then we took C to Coldstone Creamery as a special You-Don't-Get-To-Attend-A-Birthday-Party-But-You-DO-Get-To-Go-Shopping-With-Mom-And-Dad treat. They have salted caramel yogurt and it was divine. 

A has made up a dozen Harry Potter jokes and they all go something like this: 

Q: Which wizard does Voldemort complains about?

A: Grumbledore

Q: Who is the only wizard that Voldemort can't understand?

A: Mumbledore

Q: Who is the wizard that Voldemort trips over?

A: Stumbledore

Q: Who is the most socially awkward wizard?

A: Dumbledork.

Snow Day

Knitting update: 

I finished another pattern, this time of ribbing. It was knit 2 purl 2 and then the reverse on the next row. It turned out well although you can't see the ribbing very well in the picture.

I bought some bright pink homespun yarn and bigger needles and I'm attempting a scarf, probably for C because she is the smallest. 

We were off from school for MLKJr day on Monday. I texted one of E and L's friend's mom on Saturday and invited their friend for a Sunday night sleepover. I'm enjoying the control I have right now over who their friends are. I know that'll go away. I picked one of my favorite of their friends and we had a great time. The only problem was the delicious chocolate chip cookies we made together on Monday; I completely overindulged. The friend introduced my kids to the program H20: Just Add Water about Australian girls that turn into mermaids. It's the beginning of lame older kid programs. Blech.

Oh, the other problem was that the sleepover made me totally forget about Downton Abbey. I had to avoid spoilers until we had time to watch it Wednesday night.

Speaking of older kids, we had to cancel a case at work this week because the patient's pregnancy test (standard before any procedure on a female under 50 unless she's had a hysterectomy) turned up positive. She was 14. ACK, I said on Twitter and I stand by that.  

We had another young girl who needed an implanted defibrillator and chose to have it placed submammory instead of in the usual subclavicular position. It's mainly for vanity's sake and only offered to young people - if you've seen anyone with an implanted pacer or defibrillator, you know you can see a small bulge where the generator is located. You can't see that submammory.

The plastic surgeon came in to assist. He made an incision at the bottom of the left breast and separated the breast tissue from the muscle, creating a pocket for the generator. Then the EP cardiologist threaded the defibrillator wire down into that pocket from above the breast. The bottom line is that at one point, they had her breast tissue separated from her chest by about four inches. It was gruesome. It's all done under general anesthesia, but still. I would always choose the regular position if possible. I am traumatized by the procedure; it was the first one I've seen.

On Tuesday morning I was driving to work when I got a phone call from school telling us it was a snow day. My stress level skyrocketed as I worked to figure out what I could do with my kids at the last minute. This is the worst part of working daytime hours. I had just used my FIL last week while C was sick, so I called Karen to see if her kids had a ridiculous (seriously- very little snow, just cold temperatures) snow day, too. They did and she graciously agreed to watch mine, too. I put my name on the board to leave early and we had finished enough procedures that I got to leave by 2:30. It worked out well, but unexpected lack of school is stressful.

Unintended Nickname

E and L have occasionally called each other "El" or "Lor" for a few years now. I'm not a nickname fan, but it hasn't bothered me. HOWEVER. They've started to call C "Char" and I can't. I don't like it. I never intended for her to be nicknamed and I don't like Char. (I am TRULY SORRY if your name is Char. Different strokes, right?) This is the downfall to thinking I'll just correct people when they use a shortened version of her name. I can only correct HER SISTERS so many times before they start using it for the express purpose of annoying me. For the record, THEY are the only people who call her Char and despite my mild, casual request that they stop and C's request to be nicknamed "Lottie" (only slightly better), they persist. I think this will be a battle I'll choose not to fight, but I cringe with every Char.

 I followed a knitting pattern!

This is my practice for knitting an actual place mat. I cut all the numbers on the pattern in half, so my final piece is half as small vertically and horizontally as a real place mat would be. It turned out pretty well, though, and I'm pleased. Not bad for a beginner.

When I picked C up from school on Tuesday, her teacher told me that she had a very runny nose, was coughing, and cried easily. It's the first time someone has been sick since I started working day shift, so we put our theoretical sick day chain into practice. Luckily, my FIL didn't have anything planned on Wednesday, so A dropped her off that morning and she spent the day blowing her nose and playing on his iPad. We kept her home on Thursday, too, and A worked from home, but looking back I think she could have gone to school. It's hard to make that call in the 30-45 minutes between wake up and walking out the door. Anyway, this is one of the things I've been dreading and it went pretty smoothly, all things considered. She was, OF COURSE, fine to go to school today on my day off.

I've been feeling rushed and stressed for the past week and needed a pajama day, so I spent the morning in my PJs. I knitted, caught up on blogs, and did a few things around the house. It was nice and relaxing. I did a double class at the Y before picking the kids up from school. We cleaned the fish tank, they did homework and played the wii, I knitted, made brinner, etc. It was the kind of day I've been needing. I'm working myself up for my work Christmas party tomorrow night. I like the people I work with, but this awkward small talk thing at an official gathering is a nightmare for me. Plus, there are names I don't know, so I've warned A that I'll have to do that thing where I say,"Oh hi! This is my husband, A!" and hope they supply their name. 

We have had a rash of adorable snuggling lately:

E and L have been sleeping in the same bed recently and I can't help but love it. They started life all smushed together. It makes sense that it's a normal thing for them. Plus, we are a snuggly family.

I've noticed while tracking my food (oh, today was painful) that I eat a lot of granola bars. I've never thought specifically about my granola bars before, but if I eat one every day, I should probably be more aware. The ones I eat are mostly sugar (HFCS when I looked at the label). They taste delicious, but probably shouldn't make up so much of my diet as they are nutritionally close to candy bars. 

So I am looking for granola bar suggestions. I would like them to be mouthy. I want to know I'm eating something - I'm looking at YOU, Luna bar - as well as delicious and filling. I would probably prioritize filling over delicious. Granola bars are something I grab to avoid making a bad food choice before my next meal. Suggestions appreciated and no, I'm not going to make my own, but thanks.

I volunteered in the 3rd grade today and got to categorize AR information for new books. While organizing, I noticed a book that I hadn't heard of and opened it to a random page to check it out. It's about a young boy who gets lost and makes friends with a badger. I opened to the page where the mama badger's paw is caught in a trap and she is struggling struggling struggling while she can HEAR HER HUNGRY BABIES CRYING FOR HER. She struggles for THREE DAYS AND THREE NIGHTS as the cries grow fainter. Finally, ignoring the pain, she CHEWS HER OWN PAW OFF but by the time she makes it back, half her babies are dead. She tries to nurse the others, but they're dead by morning. OMG WHAT KIND OF HORRIBLE BOOK IS THIS? I only read a few pages (I kept hoping everything would be okay) and I'm traumatized. I told A and he replied, "Wow. That book pushed all your buttons."

It was L's Swedish Name Day today and we celebrated with all the Lauras/Loris/etc in Sweden. She choose coconut shrimp for dinner and we had kladdkaka with whipped cream and raspberries for dessert. I'm trying to find a Swedish themed plate that I can serve the kladdkaka on. I thought about finding some name-themed gift (I was at Michaels and they had cute thank you cards with a fancy L on them), but I'm not sure I want to commit to that. 

Speaking of L, she finished her first hot pad (or trivet, if you are Christine) and I used it to cool the kladdkaka. Yarn was on sale for $1 at Michaels, so I bought a bunch of multicolored yarn for us. She's working on another hotpad and I'm making a prototype placemat from this pattern. It's my second sample. I spent FOREVER trying to figure out why I kept doubling the first purl stitch I did. It turns out that NONE of the instructions I found mentioned that you have to pull your yarn through your needles to the front before the first stitch. Once I figured that out, I was fine. 

We had our first official roller skating lesson yesterday. The girls tried roller blades this time and even C was skating by herself by the end of the class. I skated behind each girl and took a short video of them skating so that we can document (hopefully) some progress.

C had been invited to a birthday party, so we swung by the bookstore and chose a gift for the birthday boy. I was hesitant. The invitation had been normal*, but when I asked the mom for gift ideas, she said, "Oh, don't worry about a present, but thank you for the thought." Normally, I totally respect that. I've sent E and L with only homemade cards when it says "No gifts please" on the invitation. But what if I was the only one who ASKED? I hemmed and hawed, but decided to go with a token gift. C picked out a big book of transformers, made a card, and we stuck a bow on it. A says there were other gifts, so we were fine.

*There was only a phone number, but I took a chance and texted a reply AND IT PAID OFF. That made me happy for the rest of the day.

We went to Red Robin to celebrate A's 38th birthday and I ate a ridiculously bad-for-me burger and side of onion rings. When we got home, A took the doors off our old, now broken basement fridge and we hauled it up to the curb. I had bought a special sticker needed for the sanitation workers to pick it up and I'm pissed I stuck it on because the fridge was gone in a few hours. I don't know why I'm surprised; we put stuff on the curb all the time and it disappears. 

We had a movie night of Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix. It was the first time I had seen this one and I only watched it because of E and L's request. The books are too full of rich detail; the movies are bound to be disappointing. It was. On the good side, I knit another hot pad/trivet while I watched.

I have to mention that E has saved her money for months to buy a big stuffed tiger she saw at the mall. When we went to buy it, we discovered the store was a temporary holiday store and was gone. We looked online and found it for the same price. It arrived last week. It's not like we need any more stuffed animals (what is their obsession?!), but she's so pleased. She named her Emily, after the heroine of the Amulet series. 

Food Diary

I feel like I have a pretty good idea about my main faults (stubbornness, need to be right, insensitivity when sensitivity is inconvenient, quick temper, pride . . . I could go on, but this is getting kind of depressing) and it's come to my attention that I'm perfectly capable of lying to myself about what I eat. I can totally negate a half dozen cookies without even blinking. I can ignore that a serving of pasta is one cup and a serving of garlic bread is two slices. I can tell myself that I'm estimating a cup of pasta when it's clearly more and that I'm eating the crusts of the garlic bread so four slices count as two. I'm able to ignore the fact that I ate donuts for lunch and pour a second glass of wine at dinner anyway. It's a amazing talent.

I've been trying to figure out what to do, how to solve this problem and get back to to the mindful eating I was doing last year. I don't like how I feel when I overeat and while that should be enough to end this cycle, it does not appear to be. Against my wishes, my brain pointed out that we should put that pride to good use and get some accountability. For some people, writing down what they eat is good enough. I was doing that for a while, but then I started leaving off the alcohol and desserts. Denial is strong here.

I've decided to keep an online food diary and you are welcome to look at if you like. Some of you are probably like "Um. No." and others are maybe "Why? Also: no." I am well aware that it's the height of egotism to have a blog in the first place and to think that someone wants to read WHAT I ATE EVERY DAY is just. . . ugh. I KNOW. But I need some sort of accountability and I am not able to be accountable to myself because I LIE to myself. The only other thing I can think of is to tell A every time I eat something and that's even grosser. I was talking to A about it and he said, "You can just lie online, too." He's right, but if I commit to No Lying or Omitting, then I won't. It will be A Rule and I'll follow it. My brain is weird.

I know there have got to be a couple of you who are weird like me. I *cough* follow a few other people's food diaries. I LIKE talking about food and seeing what people eat and how they find a balance. I like learning about new dishes or new ways to make something or getting new snack ideas.

It's intimidating to tell people exactly what I'm eating. In my mind, you all eat 1200 calories per day of organic vegetables, tofu, and brown rice and will look upon my chocolate chip cookies with disdain. Or you're doing Whole30 and are horrified by my sugar and processed foods. I don't know. I guess all I can do is admit what I eat and be mindful of my strengths (fruit, legumes) and weaknesses (portions, emotional eating, sugar) and go from there. If reading my food diary makes you feel superior, I guess I can serve as a bad example.

I'm committed to be totally honest - even the ugly parts - but I'm hoping that because I have to admit it, it will stop me from eating four brownies. If I were a better person, I would include pictures (those are my favorite food diaries) but I don't want to spend that much time on it. It's weird enough that I'm posting what I eat every day. Please don't judge me too harshly; I honestly don't know how else to break this cycle of overeating/denial. I hope that this is temporary and once I get back into good habits, I can go back to keeping a private journal.

Red Dreams

My twitter feed is full of people who are thrilled to send their kids back to school and complained regularly about the hell that is school vacations. I can't relate. I'm glad to get back into our regular routine - it's a pain to figure out childcare when they're on vacation and I'm still working - but it's fun having them home and it was such a treat to have A on vacation for a large part, too. 

Last night at dinner, E lamented going back to school, "It was so fun to play video games all day!" I gave her a stern look and made her name five things we did that were not video games. I have visions of her talking about vacation and telling people all we did was sit in front of the TV. After she reached five, L and C helped. We came up with:

sledding, going to friend's houses, feeding chickens, roller skating, learning to knit, Christmas Eve at Grandma and Grandpa's house, Christmas Day here with presents, building a snowman, watching movies and eating popcorn, swimming at the Y, reading a ton of books (almost done with The Order of the Phoenix!), and baking cookies.

Hopefully she'll mention one or two of those other things in addition to playing video games. Sheesh.

I finished my first knitting project and it is . . . a big uneven piece of material with extra stitches added regularly! Oops. I did some internet research to figure out how I'm accidentally adding stitches and my second project is coming along in a more orderly fashion.

I'm going to finish this one and then make another hot pad, attempting to alternate knit stitches and purl stitches. Maybe I'll use a different color. I'm seeing red in my sleep.

L is more enthusiastic than E, but they are both knitting. L has the same problem of adding on stitches that I do, so I showed her how to cast off and told her I'd helped her start a new one. When I came back, she had cast on all by herself and was already on her fourth row of stitches.

If you have any ideas for a second beginner project after we finish our hot pad(s), please advise!

Edited to add: Christine's comment makes me think that I need to clarify that a hot pad is what you set a warm dish on so that you don't scorch the table. An oven mitt is what you use to actually handle the dish. I realize my precious knitting would not protect me from heat.

Firsts

We went to our first roller skating lesson today only to find out that it was posted wrong on the website, wrong in my confirmation email, and correctly in the community education book. Guess which two I looked at? There were tears as we sat in an empty parking lot in front of a locked building. We decided to run a few errands and come back for the open skate an hour later. They let us in for open skate and while the girls cheered up, I was less cheerful. The learning to skate part was the part I wanted to outsource to someone else. 

E and L picked it up pretty quickly and within an hour were skating slowly around the rink. I was impressed with their perseverance and pain tolerance. We thought that they'd get better at falling, but no. When they fell, they fell hard and sprawled all over. C had a rough start and finally I made A take over for me because I wanted to throttle her and her five-year-old (lack of) logic. He was more patient (of course. sigh) and had her skating between the benches by the time we were done. The official lessons start next week, so maybe we'll be a bit ahead of the crowd.

This afternoon, A's cousin came over and taught us how to knit! I have a knitting project now!

Isn't it cute? It's going to be a hot pad, I hope. L made a bookmark and while she was determined, I wonder if it's a bit too hard for her right now. I had a hard time getting the needles into the right place and muscling the yarn onto the needles. E half-heartedly did a couple of rows, but I'm not sure what she thought. I think roller skating might have exhausted their endurance and brain capacity for learning new things.

I'm not usually a big fan of internet videos (A makes fun of me all the time about this), but I watched all 25 minutes of this one about the space station. It was FASCINATING. There's an article attached with it, too, so at least read that part. The commander is giving a tour and answering questions that kids have asked her. She is adorably enthusiastic, gives such great explanations, and makes it all really interesting.

Chai

I think I mentioned that L is allowed to make her own Chai tea and it makes her feel like such an adult. You should see her sitting at the table, wearing her robe, reading her book, and drinking her tea. She's already an old lady. I found this recipe for Chai Brown Sugar cookies, so we made those today. They're very good, although if you don't like Chai tea maybe you wouldn't like them. This was not a problem for us.

Yesterday both A and I had to work, so Karen was kind enough to watch my kids AND totally exhaust them. I had given them a near continuous lecture in the previous twenty-four hours of "I have this new job and there will be times I'll need to ask Aunt Karen to watch you, so you MUST MUST MUST be on your VERY BEST BEHAVIOR and be kind and helpful and polite so that when I ask her the next time, she doesn't think 'NO WAY IN HELL', okay? OKAY?"

I picked them up to a good report, so no one had to spend the night in the Box of Shame and as a bonus, they were wiped out. Nothing like ten hours with friends to make them scarf down dinner and collapse into bed without complaint. L didn't even want a book and fell asleep (at 7:15! A full hour ahead of schedule!) while I was reading to C. 

A found an Indigo Girls Christmas album that I must have bought out of habit and never listened to until this year. (Oh! When I found that link, Amazon was kind enough to tell me that I ordered it in 2010.) We listened to it and it's all very good, but the girls have been listening and dancing to Happy Joyous Hanakkuh practically nonstop. I asked Persephone if it was a traditional Jewish song at all (minus the IG, of course) and she said no. It's catchy, though!

We got The Incredibles for Christmas and I actually TEARED UP at two parts. (SPOILERS!) The part where Elastigirl is panicking as the missiles close in on the plane where she and her kids are and then she saves them (sob) and at the end, when Syndrome has Jack-Jack, it all looks lost, and she turns to her husband and says, "Throw me, Bob. Throw ME!" (SOB) Motherhood, man.